I'M WAITING...

Waiting for you to make the first move.
Met buddy after school today. (Y) Saw zhao cong(fat-fat)!! DING TAI FENG; YOU OWE ME.
I don't understand... you.

I thought it'll be a secret, but people do actually read it.
I need a buddy. Its tough....... a rough route. I can't cope.

NO ONE UNDERSTANDS WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH. I may seems fine, and when people ask me "Hey, are you alright?"
I'll definitely say "Umm, yea fine." But in fact, its vice versa.

Struggling in school, every single day.
One day i might just blow up and not talk to anyone.
24hours aren't enough for me. I've got so much things to do but i don't know where to start.
I'VE NEVER BEEN SO EMOTIONAL FOR SO LONG BEFORE, SERIOUSLY.
Edited:

If i were given another chance, i wouldn't step into tp, or rather this particular course. I would rather accept the offer given by nanyang poly, or MDIS college, SIM university or Kaplan to further my studies. Many friends in nyp were happy though they kept complaining the time taken to travel back and fro. MDIS, i would say would be fun, kaplan, nevertheless to say, thumbs up. Not to mention SIM.
I need time to pause, just for a moment to allow me to think specifically what I'm doing now.
Exactly what i want, what i need, what i intended to do.
I'm sure, for the another 3years, i will be suffering, just like now.
It sucks. I hate it.
Its not as though i didn't try to spice my school a little, by being more sociable, it didn't helped, at all.
My life's in a mess &i brought the mess upon myself.
I'm in dilemma now.